My story starts at age 19 (in 2011) when I began having issues with ovarian cysts. This is also when I experienced my first miscarriage. At the time I thought it was just a really horrible horrendous period. It was scary as up until that point I had never experienced clotting or anything similar. It was my mom who came to the conclusion that I had had a miscarriage. I was 8 weeks, and this is the furthest I would make it in any pregnancy for the next 13 years.
As I rounded on 20 (on 2012) I was diagnosed via laparoscopic surgery, with endometriosis. I have fought with Endo and PCOS since. I suffered 5 more miscarriages in the last 13 years.
No matter how many you have, they never get easier. You try to hold on to hope but hope is a cruel thing. Eventually, after 6 miscarriages, 4 surgeries, injections, endless rounds of clomid and femara, painful procedures and diagnostics, a 15% potential success rate through IVF and divorce…. I gave up.
I went in for a consult to have a 5th surgery with the expectation it would be a hysterectomy. This specialist gave me the tiniest seed of hope, which ended up being my hail Mary in every way possible. She determined that I was not in fact beyond hope, and Eve though with stage 4 Endo, PCOS and now Lupus, she believed that she could clean up and improve my fertility.
I decided to give it a shot and with faith and a prayer I underwent a 5th endometrial laparoscopy and bilateral cystectomy.
After months of painful recovery, I met with a sperm donor I had worked with previously. For 1 round of AI (artificial insemination). Previously I would do this every day for the week of ovulation, but I was at the end of my rope and still in pain from my surgery months before.
I did not for one second think there was any way it could have possibly worked with already dire odds and such a minimal attempt.
3 weeks later, I realized my cycle was late. Expecting that obvious negative result on the stick, I left it upside down on the counter and got ready for work. I came back and it was the darkest double line I have ever had. In utter shock, I did a second different type and was shocked to watch it instantly go the darkest pink double lines if ever seen.
I refused to let myself believe it and went next door to wake up my mom, to make sure I was seeing what I was seeing. She was equally as confused and shocked as I was. I went in for a blood test a few hours after that and over the next week watched as the numbers tripled each time.
I am currently 6 months pregnant with a little girl, as of November 2025. It is still hard to believe and completely, 100% a miracle of epic proportions.
I cannot say it has been easy, it definitely has not. The first trimester was terrifying and anxiety ridden. I purchased a fetal Doppler, and I listen to her heartbeat every single night to make sure she’s still real and healthy and nothing has happened.
I see babies out and about and it’s not a punch in the heart as it once was. I stepped in to the baby section at my local target, and had an awesome struck moment that I could be there, that a moment I never thought would happen was real.
I don’t have words to express the absolute soul filling joy, and gratitude and all of the feelings that I am filled with every day because of my little miracle rainbow baby.
I hope that every single woman out there struggling, can find that teeny tiny bit of hope, because of it can happen for me after 13 years, it can absolutely happen for them.
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