I had a very early loss before going on to have my son in March of 2022. He is the absolute light of my life, I’ve chosen to keep him off of social media, but I cannot gush enough about how much I adore him. His pregnancy was impacted by Severe HG, Secondary Chronic Hypertension of pregnancy (seemingly due to transient central hypothyroidism), worrisome weight loss and then worrisome weight gain, a Marginal Cord Insertion that progressed to a Velamentous Cord Insertion, and Macrosomia.
We also had a very difficult time postpartum, with postpartum OCD, a profound lip and tongue tie that was undiagnosed for almost 4 months, feeding issues, and colic. We managed to overcome all of that, and are so happy with our beautiful family.
Unfortunately, 11 months after having him, I had another early loss in February of 2023. We had considered being one and done before the loss, but my desire to give my son a sibling and meet another earthside baby grew. Because of my high risk pregnancy with my son, we did everything we could to prepare for another pregnancy. We considered IVF, but decided against it due lack of support, political fears, and the hefty price tag for the “add ons” we’d need. So we decided to TTC naturally, under the monitoring of my OB and multiple specialists.
In January of 2024 we had another loss. At some point between January and February, I went in for a lining check, which showed a fairly thin lining, but not enough to be overly concerned. Later in February we found out we were pregnant again- which turned into another high risk pregnancy. I had refractory HG and a reccurent Mallory-Weiss tear leading to hospitalization. While hospitalized, I experienced life threatening complications, including a DVT without the option of blood thinners due to the MW tear. I was severely dehydrated, but we couldn’t keep an IV line or even a midline placed for more than a day or so without it infiltrating. No medications stopped the vomiting.
In April, we experienced another loss. I dealt with the fallout of the complications from that pregnancy through the rest of 2024 and still am in many ways. After extensive testing, we recieved approval from Genetics, MFM, Hematology, my PCP, and finally my OB to TTC again. In August 2024, another early loss hit us, almost immediately after getting the approval to TTC.
My husband and I were getting exhausted, we were grateful to get pregnant easily, but we were crushed to not be able to stay pregnant- and to have had such severe pregnancy complications. We decided to give it til December of 2024, but then quickly changed that to October, one of the months we’d have been due in. We had plans to take a long break if October came and went without a positive.
One of the ways I’d worked through some of my grief and fears after our April loss, was to make bereavement items for my local L&D ward. I donated those items around their due date, to the same place I’d almost died and lost that baby at. It was heavy, especially because a few days before donating, I’d gotten another Positive test. This pregnancy, my current pregnancy, is my 7th. We started heavy monitoring immediately, as well as repeat betas to check how my doubling was going (we were shocked to see my doubling time be 21 hours!!).
I started Lovenox and a refractory HG prevention protocol, some of the medicines are experimental- with me seemingly being the first patient in both of my clinics to use it for refractory HG, but we’ve had great success overall- so I likely won’t be the last!! We had our first ultrasound with MFM at around 4.5 weeks and could only really see a thickened lining (yay for thick lining) and the start of a gestational sac, which was to be expected at such an early scan.
Our next scan was about 2 weeks later at 6.5 weeks, and we saw a beautiful little baby bean with a fluttering heartbeat. I’ve been going to the OB every 2 weeks and the MFM around every 4-8 weeks. We get quick handheld ultrasounds at the OB every time, which are grainy, but so reassuring. We had a beautiful NT scan at 12 weeks with MFM and got the sweetest pictures of baby in 3D. We also got a clear NIPT test and learned that we’re having a little girl. At 19 weeks we had a beautiful anatomy scan with MFM.
At 21 weeks, I started having contractions and softening of the cervix. We spent that night in L&D triage, discussing how we’d lose our baby girl if labor didn’t stop. Discussing how we’d only be able to hold and try and comfort her as she passed in our arms. With some medication and modified bedrest, we stopped the contractions consistency. We then spent the next month or so in terror knowing that if contractions picked back up in a consistent manner, it was too early to provide life saving interventions. Once we passed the milestone of survivability we could breathe a bit easier, but its been hard.
We’ve spent the last 8 weeks successfully fighting off active labor, still having contractions, but with enough irregularity that labor hasn’t progressed. I’ve also been dealing with transient blood pressure spikes, severe pain from dislocations, and severe pain from the veins involved in my DVT from 2024. I just recently hit 29 weeks. I’m still scared I’ll go home with one of my donated bereavement items, instead of this baby, but I’m just trying to lean into love and gratitude over fears.
I’m finally starting to breathe a little, though I know the road ahead is still long and that there is no safe point in pregnancy. Pregnancy after reccurent loss is hard, high risk pregnancy after multiple high risk pregnancies is hard, experimental protocols are hard, but ultimately I’m just so grateful to have another chance and to grow my baby girl. I’m trying to make myself enjoy some of the “normal” parts of pregnancy, though I have few normal parts. I wanted to do maternity photos this time.
Kaylie went into labor a day before her scheduled repeat c-section. She ended up having a rapid c-section under general anesthesia and baby girl was born safely. Kaylie had a minor hemorrhage during the c-section, but everything seemed to have resolved. Unfortunately, 4 hours after birth, Kaylie began to hemorrhage in her Mom & Baby recovery room. Kaylie lost 5.4 L of blood total, and needed 17 units of blood products. She experienced respiratory failure and hypovolemic shock. She was rushed back to the OR where she had an emergency hysterectomy and right side salpingo-oophorectomy. After extubation and a brief ICU stay, Kaylie was reunited with her baby girl and her husband. Later that evening, their son would join them at the hospital and meet his baby sister, a memory Kaylie will cherish forever. It continues to be a hard road of recovery, but having their family all together, is a priceless gift. Kaylie is so grateful to have her children and her husband, and her life.
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