My husband has said from the beginning of our relationship that he couldn’t deprive this world of me as a mother. And admittedly it had been my dream all my life. But I knew if it wasn’t meant to work out to have children of my own, I was blessed with two bonus children.
We began planning our family about 2 years ago looking into the fertility world for help. We went through IVF and the whole process was a growing experience for both of us. We were fortunate enough that our first transfer was successful and we were elated. Then at our 9 week appointment we heard the awful words “there is no heartbeat”. It broke us both. Everything we had planned and knew came crashing down in an instant. It strengthened our relationship as we leaned on each other more than ever for support but we realized miscarriage from the husband’s side is never really spoken about. And that’s why we choose to share our story.
We want other couples to know if you are going through infertility or loss, you are not alone. If you need to talk to someone who has been there, we’re here. It’s been a 2 year process with lots of tears but also a lot of joy. Groups like this one, Project Finding your rainbow, have been so helpful to me to hear from other mothers going through the same emotions. While we are thrilled for our rainbow baby to be here, the pregnancy did not come without anxiety along the way. Fear of another miscarriage.
This baby has been prayed for and is already so loved. Benjamin, we can’t wait to meet you – we know you were handpicked by your sibling in heaven.
Photos taken by Mustard Seed Photography/Misty Wood.
Find out more about Project Finding Your Rainbow.
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