Ashleigh’s Story

 

My name is Ashleigh, I live in a small town in central Massachusetts. I met my husband ten years ago Freshman year of college. We’ve been married for over 4 years now. We decided to start trying for a baby because my husband got a new job and was finishing up grad school. We also moved out of our apartment and bought our first house together. 

In June 2019, I learned that I was having a miscarriage. I had what is called a missed miscarriage. At the time my husband and I were actively trying for a baby for about a year. We were happy to find out that I could get pregnant but sad at the same time, wondering who that child would have been. 

Fast forward to December 2019, we found out we were expecting! It was finally the rainbow after the storm! I didn’t want to find out what we were having so I had to convince my husband to leave it a surprise until our delivery day.

The first trimester of my pregnancy went well, with minimal morning sickness and exhaustion. I had some spotting in the beginning but it ended in my second trimester. All of my doctors appointments and ultrasounds were great with no worries. 

“I was 25 weeks along when I didn’t feel right.”

I was 25 weeks along when I didn’t feel right. I had flu-like symptoms and napped most of the day. I just thought I ate something weird the day before. My husband left to get food while I was taking a nap. I woke up with back pain and groin pain. I called my mom, who’s a nurse and she told me to call my doctor. At this point I was hysterical. I called my husband and told him to hurry home. He rushed home, and called my doctor.

At this point I was pacing around the house. My doctor was not alarmed and told me to try and rest. I tried to sit in the recliner, but it made me more uncomfortable. We decided to drive to the small hospital that was 5 minutes from our house. Before we left my husband called and told them we were on our way. 

When we arrived, the security wouldn’t allow my husband to come in with me. Well funny enough, I had the keys to the car in my purse with me. He frantically called all of our family members to tell them what was going on. 

While I was upstairs in Maternity/Delivery, my contractions were getting worse. The nurses decided to call my doctor to come in since they couldn’t slow down the contractions. After an hour and a half alone, my husband was finally allowed to come up and be with me. The nurses and doctor decided that I should go to a bigger hospital with a NICU just in case the baby decided to come early. Well the ambulance never showed up to bring me there. 

My doctor quickly decided that the baby had to be delivered there. Before I knew it I was being wheeled into the operating room, I later found out there was only 1 operating room there. The NICU team showed up minutes after the doctor delivered my son via C-Section. My husband and I didn’t know what was going on with our new baby. We didn’t hear a cry, just complete silence. I was so out of it and completely exhausted. A couple of minutes later the NICU doctor walked over to us and told us that it was a boy and he didn’t make it.

“I quickly decided to name him Lincoln Norberto Goulart.”

I told my husband that I couldn’t cry. I felt awful as my husband started to cry and the NICU doctor had to walk away from us because he also began to cry. I was able to hold his little body and see his face when I left the operating room. I quickly decided to name him Lincoln Norberto Goulart. We chose that name a couple days before. Norberto is after my husband’s grandfather, who passed away in July 2019. 

I still to this day can’t believe we made such a beautiful little boy. He was perfect. I call him my little bear because he had a round face covered in peach fuzz. He looked just like my husband’s grandfather, it’s uncanny to me. 

Since losing my son, I decided to dive into my Mary Kay business I started in April 2019. I always loved makeup and would spend an absurd amount at Ulta and Sephora. When my neighbor showed me the products, I knew that I needed to sign up for this! I was so excited when I started, I grew a team quickly and I was able to walk away from a couple of the 2nd and 3rd jobs I had to supplement my preschool teacher income. Because of Covid my business went from in person to all virtual. So I went through my friends list on Facebook and see if they would host a party for me.

Through my friends on Facebook, I met other women who wanted to join this business, make some extra money, and get their products at a discount. My small team of 2 quickly grew into a team of 31 in about 4 months. We recently earned a car too! Not the pretty pink Cadillac yet, but the first level car, the Chevy Malibu. I also gave myself 3 promotions. I am now a Sales Director with Mary Kay and I not only make a profit from my sales but I earn commission from my team. 

“And I can’t thank my angels in heaven enough for paving this road for me.”

And I can’t thank my angels in heaven enough for paving this road for me. I of course would trade directorship and a brand new car for them any day. But they pushed me to be better and to shine a light for others. I believe they wouldn’t want me to sit around and be sad that they are gone. I never use their story to get a sale or a new team member, all of my team members learn after they agree to sign up my story of my son and what I went through with him. 

I also can’t thank my friends, family, husband and my Mary Kay sisters for being there during the darkest and worst time in my life. They held me together when I felt like everything was falling apart. 

Pictured is me in my Mary Kay Sales Director jacket and the rainbow skirt. I associate the success of my Mary Kay business with a rainbow after the storm. 

 

pregnancy loss

 

pregnancy loss

 

pregnancy loss

 

pregnancy loss

 

Find out more about Project Finding Your Rainbow

 

 

17 thoughts on “Ashleigh’s Story”

  1. laurabooksandblogs

    Thanks for sharing your story. My mom used to work at a women’s hospital, and she saw a lot of women who miscarried or whose babies were born premature and didnt make it. Each one found a different way to deal with it, and I’m glad that you found a healthy, productive way to deal with yours.

  2. Smelly Socks and Garden Peas

    This is so touching Ashleigh. After 2 boys, a missed miscarriage and a disastrous pregnancy with an IUD, we lost our baby boy3 under similar circumstances at 20 weeks in early 2019. Afterwards we found out there was an infection in the placenta and if he hadn’t been born, I would likely have developed sepsis and in the worst case my boys might have grown up without a mum. Thank you for sharing, you aren’t alone and nor am I.

  3. Thank you for sharing your story about your son. I have also endured the pain of the loss of many babies. My daughter Megan was stillborn at 38 weeks gestation. All of the other losses were in the first or second trimester. It’s important to know we are not alone.

  4. Such a sad but beautiful and inspiring story to read. I know a lot of women experiencing this and I am sure you give them strength and hope that they can overcome it like you.

  5. Thank you for sharing your beautiful story. It brought tears to my eyes. So glad you found a way to move forward and congrats on your success.

  6. Pingback: Project Finding Your Rainbow – Journey for Jasmine

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