This morning getting ready for Mothers Day church service, I put on a dress I bought over 4 years ago but never had the chance to wear.
I bought it early for the baby shower I knew I’d have later that year (2018). I had not told too many people yet but I was 12 weeks pregnant.
Little did I know I’d go in for an ultrasound to check to see if baby #2 had a heartbeat or if I was indeed just carrying one baby. My life stopped in the moment of that ultrasound. What was meant to be an exciting experience either way turned into the worst thing ever.
There was no baby #2 at all and although baby #1 had a strong heartbeat weeks earlier, now there was silence. My husband was there but didn’t hold my hand or embrace me. It was all just silence. The ultrasound tech just said “I’m sorry “.
I went home to labor with the help of meds to keep me from having surgery, but that was unsuccessful. My body would not let go of the baby and my heart never has either. But this year I’ve been blessed with a miracle.
I’m divorced and going to be a single mom but I have the best support from amazing family and Friends. I couldn’t be happier! I got to wear the dress I bought for my baby shower finally! I wore it for Mothers Day in honor of the baby I lost exactly 4 years ago.
His rainbow baby brother is growing strong. He moves so much, I know to remind me he’s there and real and growing! My heart will always mourn for my other baby but I trust in Gods plan and I know he had a better purpose for my other baby than for him to live in this world. But now he’s blessing me with a worldly child while he keeps my others safe in eternity!
Photos taken by Kate’s Takes.
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